Do you ever have those moments when you outperform even your best expectations? To date, you've done "it" (whatever your it is) better than you ever have before. Your fans are throwing roses at you, your agent is fantasizing about making it big, and you are thinking, "Oh, shit. What if I never do this "it" this wonderfully again?"
Am I alone in this feeling? When high praise equals high anxiety? What is it that transforms a great achievement into an altar to apprehension, insecurity, obstruction?
I think in these moments we are worshiping the result, rather than the process.
What do you think?
If one cannot truly enjoy the process, it might be time to take a break. The body and mind are in constant change. What if I do it better? Is praise required? Some times it's difficult to gain perspective when your in the moment.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comments, Bill! All good points. In the context of being successful at my work (whether at work or my writing outside of work), praise isn't necessarily required, but creating pieces that are impactful and interesting to my audience is important (in keeping my job, for one; more personally: to impel me to continue on this path). So when my writing is enjoyed and I know it, I default to self-doubt mode, wondering if I can repeat that instance of inspiration. I've always been curious if this happens to other people. Or just silly me. :)
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